The options are endless.  What to chose? What to chose?

I am resolving to living healthier.  I need my mind sharp and my body functioning to the fullest abilities when I am 80 and 90.  We in my family live long.  We don’t always stay sharp though.

I’ve never much cared about being uber healthy or ultra thin.  I’ve always been in good health, and I suppose I am now.  But I can *feel* things are shifting.  Weight doesn’t fall off as easily as it used it when I put my mind to it.  My bum wrist is starting to show those early signs of arthritis.  My spine is more comfortable slouched than straight up.  And these now minor changes are as big to me as if they were a neon sign: Your body is getting older and not doing your biding as quickly as it always has.

So I am upping the ante.  If the same-old/same-old isn’t enough to get me feeling the best I know my body can feel, then it’s time to recommit to yoga.  And eat more vegetables.  And jumping rope too.

Living in New Orleans results in Food being a word that starts with a Capital Letter.  We LOVE to eat; to cook; to celebrate with Food and by Food.  I am NOT giving up Food.  I’d just as well as move to Nebraska where a good meal is simply a steak.  But in order to get the full benefit of life in New Orleans while at the same time keeping my mind and body fully functioning for another 41 years, I am resolved to getting off my sofa more and onto my yoga mat.

Namaste and Happy New Year.

Anyone who practices can acquire the yoga siddhis (powers), but not one who is lazy. Yoga siddhis are not obtained by merely reading textbooks. Nor are they reached by wearing yoga garments or by conversation about yoga, but only through tireless practice. This is the secret of success. There is no doubt about it.

Hatha Yoga Pradipika (Chapter 4, Verses 65-66)

Of course, I read that in one of my yoga texts. But I like the spirit of this charge–Do! I was once given good advise by someone far wiser than me, “It’s time to stop thinking and start writing.” He meant it in my selecting the path of my career. But it is farther reaching in my life than just that. Here’s a case of stop blogging and get to the mat. So that’s where I’m off to, my yoga mat.

Namaste, y’all!

I wish I was still as impassioned as I was a decade ago. I don’t even use recycled checks anymore. And since Katrina, there is currently no recycling of trash going on at all in my home. I am disappointed in myself.

I do reuse things–we are using many borrowed and second-hand items for Sun. And I pass on magazines and books that I read. Better than that, I use the public library regularly and try not to buy books.  I use a coffee mug instead of plastic cups in the office, and I even use the recycled grocery bags instead of the disposable ones. We do not buy bottled water–we use a Brita filter instead. And I DO NOT drive an SUV–the hubs and I both drive small, gas-efficient cars–and neither two dogs, a cat nor a baby will change that.

But it isn’t enough. Rekindling my Yoga practice has reminded me of the yamas, the rules for living virtuously. And one yama, asteya, provides for non-coveting, taking only what one needs and no more. In an America consumed with consumerism, this rule can easily get lost. Keeping up with the Jones’ has been brought to a new level.

So my endeavor as I work the physical aspects of Yoga is to likewise work on asteya. And my hope is that this heightened awareness will be reflected in how I treat the environment. I’ll start with stopping my use of the plastic-laden floss picks that I love and return to the use of just plain dental floss. Sometimes its the small things we do collectively that CAN make a difference.

Here’s what I’ve done so far:

1. Written countless thank-you notes for the gifts we’ve received since Sun was born. I am currently caught up!

2. Opened a savings account for Sun. What happened to the passbook savings? Now, instead of the cool passbook, they give you what looks like a check register. Not nearly as exciting to watch grow. Plus, the bank didn’t even enter her initial deposit–they expect me to do it. The passbook was much more official looking. To bad they are gone.

3. Opened a 529 account for Sun’s college savings. Can’t start early enough, from my way of thinking, to save for the ever-increasing cost of college.

4. Written two condolence cards. Let’s hope there will be no more of these any time soon.

5. Got caught up with reading my old newspapers and magazines. Also have read many novels during these eight weeks.

Still to do are the following items:

1. Finish knitting a blanket I started in October. I really am ready for a new and smaller project.

2. Balance my checkbook. From 2005. Katrina kinda threw me off (I love to blame as much as I can on Katrina!).

3. Resolve breastfeeding issues (hahahaha).

4. Lose remaining baby weight and an additional bit of weight (this will require me eating out less).

5. Resume yoga (have signed up for class starting in September–yipee!!).

6. Do laundry. There always seems to be laundry to do.

7. Fill in items in Sun’s baby book.

8. Print photographs to put in Sun’s photo album.

9. Sew strap for high chair (the high chair was my mother’s and the strap is missing).

10. Buy new work clothes. Want to look shiny and new when I return next month.

So much to do, so little time.

One thing that has always helped with my anxiety is yoga. A good yoga session can free my mind of all worries and anxieties–like plunging into cold water that makes you gasp for breath. You simply are brought to another mental space that is free of all that was previously on your mind.

These days, the physical aspects of my yoga practice are limited. But the lessons of yoga go well beyond standing up straight and being flexible.

It was Becky at the Audubon Yoga Studio who put me solidly on my yogic path. Becky once told our class of an incident that happened while she was in Pune, India studying under B.K.S. Iyengar. One day, some of the students got bummed out over something or other. Without realizing it, they began moping around–walking with their shoulders sunk in and their heads down. Mr. Iyengar saw this and bellowed, “Look up! Look up!”

It is Mr. Iyengar’s opinion that the mere act of looking up toward the sky can in and of itself improve your mood. Something so simple seemed so silly. But by looking up, one automatically throws one’s shoulders back and “opens one’s chest.” This creates space, and, according to Mr. Iyengar, this space leads to positive energy.

And damned if this simple rule hasn’t worked for me time and again. Positive energy? An open chest? Creating space? I don’t know what is going on physically, mentally or physiologically, but I do know that the simple act of looking up helps, even if just a little bit, with my depression and anxiety.

As I lay on the exam table getting the ultrasound Thursday and was told that Sun’s neck is hyper-extended, that she is perpetually looking up, I couldn’t help but hear Mr. Iyengar in the back of my mind admonishing his students to do the same. As worrisome as Sun’s neck situation is to me, I hold on to a deep hope I have for Sun–that she not suffer with anxiety the way her mother does and that she knows the positive results that come from looking up. And maybe all this time she is spending looking up is putting her on a path she will instinctively follow for her life–one of seeing that glass as half full.

So I made an appointment for the next day with a chiropractor that does a lot of prenatal work. I also stopped by the maternity store to buy a belt. The belt was only $15! But they were out. They’ve got a shipment coming in a day or two, so hopefully before long I can get some relief. It’s bad enough being 37 and pregnant. But this was making me feel 67–an old 67. Ugh.

Yesterday, I woke up feeling the same way I did the day before. As much as I need to be in the office, I stayed home. Oh the guilt that goes with an attorney calling in sick! But I crawled back into bed and stayed there reading blogs until it was time to see the chiropractor.

After doing several tests, the chiropractor determined (much to my relief) that it is NOT nerve pain. The muscle underneath the gluteus maximus has a “tension point.” He was kind enough to say that the muscle pain is every bit as painful as nerve pain. What I heard as the official prognosis: I have a pain in the ass. By the end of the afternoon, I was feeling a lot better. I am not sure how much relief is from the chiropractor and how much is from spending 20 hours in bed, but I won’t split hairs on that point.

So what’s this got to do with my back? Well, from about week 5 (3 weeks of ACTUALLY being pregnant), I started having lower–I mean really low–back pain. I hadn’t gained any weight and couldn’t understand it. Pregnancy Fact No.3 that I learned is that apparently your pregnant body creates a hormone that loosens and softens the soft tissue and whatnot in your lower back to make room for the growing baby. Great. So my sacrum is outta whack. I was once a devoted yogi, and I knew I needed to start practicing again to strengthen and stretch my back. But, man, I was (and still am) TIRED ALL THE TIME. But I did the yoga and the pain was better. Oh, did I mention I haven’t been in heels for months now, too? Because the pain was better, I slacked off the yoga.

For a solid week now, my back’s been killing me again. I have gained a total of 7 pounds so far (doing pretty good, I thought!) but it hurts to sit, sleep, walk, stand. IT HURTS ALL THE TIME. Except when I am having a hot bath–which a pregnant woman should not do (New Pregnancy Fact No. 4). So now I balance it–I suffer and I take quick hot baths when I can’t take it any longer. And I deal with the guilt that gives me. The doctor recommends I wear a “maternity belt” (and maybe I will try one), but I think that I don’t need a belt, I need EXERCISE. But I am so LAZY and TIRED that it is totally contrary to what I want to do when I actually have the time to do it.

So each day, I think, “how many more days?” Too many. Ugh.