Sun cried in the middle of the night. We called her to our bed and all three of us went back to sleep. A few hours later, I awoke with Sun in my arms. There was peace. And I thought, “what was that bothering me yesterday?” Then I remembered. And the obligation of guilt kicked [...]
Disappointment comes in many shades of gray. Yesterday’s disappointments were simple: black. It began to sink in that although my body DID allow me to get pregnant, it still failed in some way in not maintaining the pregnancy. That choice I felt so strongly about the night before was gone again. I have no choice. [...]
Looking back, the signs were there. But when you aren’t looking, how can you see them? So today when my period turned angry and stopped me in my tracks, I assumed it was what I’m told about ALL my new ailments: It’s yet another sign of aging. Then the flow got really heavy. No worries, [...]
I am a “tight” knitter: my stitches are tight. I have to remind myself to ease up on the tension of the yarn; relax my fingers and my mind. I knit a cap for CS years ago, and it was a big hit. It was a straight knit 4, purl 4 pattern, your typical skull [...]
I had made arrangements to go with Wendy to the knitting store to pick yarn for me to knit her daughter a scarf for Christmas. I had just finished knitting the behemoth blanket. I was very excited to return to my favorite local yarn shop for the first time since having had Sun. We stepped [...]
I have recently been writing about my time as a patient of Dr. Socks. Tomorrow’s post will likely be the last post dedicated to him. I knew the chance of my running into him at my local yarn shop sooner or later was high. I hadn’t given much thought, however, to what I’d say to [...]
co·in·ci·dence /koʊˈɪnsɪdəns/ Pronunciation Key – Show Spelled Pronunciation(koh-in-si-duh ns) –noun 1. a striking occurrence of two or more events at one time apparently by mere chance. 2. the condition or fact of coinciding. 3. an instance of this. syn·chro·nic·i·ty (sĭng’krə-nĭs’ĭ-tē, sĭn’-) -noun 1. The state or fact of being synchronous or simultaneous; synchronism. 2. Coincidence [...]
CS and I had dinner last night with a friend who confided that she is going through a difficult time. And I recognized something awful in her eyes: deep, raw pain. And it immediately took me to a place of reserved pain that I involuntarily hold within. I had intended not to blog about this [...]