Hear That?
by
I lay in bed last night greedy in utter darkness. Since having Sun, we keep a nightlight on in her room and sleep with our bedroom doors open. It’s never dark enough for me at night anymore. Or quiet enough. Every time I stir in the middle of the night, I automatically look for that light and listen for the quiet to know Sun is soundly sleeping.
Sun spent the last two nights at my sister’s house, and I’ve had the luxury of darkness. And quiet. A quiet that is different from the quiet that comes from a soundly sleeping child. This quiet was of the knowledge that your child was soundly sleeping and that someone else with whom you have complete confidence is charged with the duty of listening for that break in sound sleeping. I didn’t have to keep my ears cued, my arms ready to welcome a Sun awoken by a bad dream (maybe of an evil witch in her fairy tales?), my eyes adjusted to having a light in them all night.
I lay in quiet thinking, “This used to be the quiet I heard every night.” And although at first blush it may sound the same as the quiet of a soundly sleeping child, any parent can tell you (while holding back a chuckle) that it is NOWHERE near the same.
I miss my Sun. And am delighted to be seeing her in a couple of hours. But, oh, how I miss my nights of darkness and quiet.
Before kids, I could sleep like a rock. Now, even though one is living way from home and the other is well into his teens, I can still hear him turn over in the middle of the night. When I am away from home, or if he is, it is almost too quiet.
.-= Tara R.´s last blog ..February morning =-.
That is really a wonderful kind of quiet. I almost feel guilty about how much I appreciate when it happens to me.
Almost.
.-= Ed´s last blog ..The Melancholy of Monochrome =-.
Amen Sister!
life is change. and now that my sons are grown and no longer live with me, the sounds i listen for in the night are their cellphone ring tones.
they think nothing of calling me at 2:30am. to have a nice long chat.
it’s all good.
lovely post. well done.