Sun Won’t Remember Zella
Jul 29th, 2008 by Nola
Zella died today. She was our 11+ year old German shepherd. Actually, she was my husband’s dog. He came with a dog, I came with a cat; they are both now gone.
I was never a dog person, especially a large dog person. The main reason for this was that I was not around dogs growing up. We were a cat family. So when I met CS and he had a large dog, it took a while for me to even go in the back yard to meet her. And slowly I learned how sweet and gentle she was. Then CS went out of town and asked if I’d feed her. Wha? I wasn’t THAT into her. But the things we do for love! And I learned she was a sweetie.
Then CS and I got married. And Zella stayed in her back yard and me inside. Then CS went out of town again. And I took it upon myself to walk Zella in his absence. She loved it. And so did I. And we walked every day. She was very well behaved; she was a gentle giant.
Within the year, I decided Zella was lonely and needed a friend. Enter Lucy, our (then) puppy Australian cattle dog, or blue heeler. They got along fine. And we began to walk both dogs.
Then Hurricane Katrina hit, and we evacuated. After the tension of a 13 hour car ride, we were all testy. Once in the hotel, Lucy and Zella went at each other. And this “dog thing” all being new to me, I jumped in to separate them. And got bit. By Zella. Some stitches later in my left wrist, I regained the fear I once had of large dogs.
Since the bite, almost three years now, if CS or I spent time with the dogs, they’d get jealous of the other’s attention from us. And they’d start to fight; it was the only time they fought. And it forced me not to spend time with them both. And as Zella aged, she got more aggressive. So our walks all but ended. And I’d feel guilty walking Lucy and not Zella, also, so my walks with Lucy all but ended, too.
The two dogs would sleep inside on hot, cold or wet nights. When I got pregnant, their room needed to be converted to the nursery. To accommodate the dogs, we built a porch on the back of the house. The dogs took to it right away; it was immediately their space.
In the past six months, Zella has been struggling with walking. Her hip displasia was really kicking in. It got to where she’d not even leave the screened-in porch for any reason. It got messy in the porch, and we knew she was on the decline.
Yesterday, she couldn’t walk. And she whimpered when she was moved. Today, CS took her to the vet and they “put her down.” And we cleaned the back porch, then swung Sun in her swing and drank a glass of wine sitting on our barely used new outdoor furniture. And we watched Lucy look for Zella.
It is going to take time for us to adjust to life without Zella. Even our neighbors will miss her (two snuck her food and another would play with her). I feel guilty for not being a better momma to her, especially since Sun’s birth, but really since Katrina; I feel bad for CS’s loss; I ache more so for the loss Lucy will realize in the next day or so (the vet prepared us for odd behavior to expect from her as she realizes Zella isn’t coming home to her); and I hate that Sun won’t remember her. Zella was a good pet, every bit a member of this family. And she is already sorely, sorely missed.
Georg Williams‘ rendering of Zella on oil.
Stumble it!
I still miss Jack every day. Funny, I wrote about him today… Hugs.
daisy duke’s last blog post..A Small Recap & Jack the Poodle
Oh no! My heart goes out to you and CS.
I remember the day you went to Williams’ studio and commissioned that painting. I was thinking about it as soon as I read the title. I had a German Shepard as a child and they have always been my favorite dog. I hope you all can adjust well - losing a pet is one of the hardest things to take, as you well know.
Peace, Zella.
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Aw, sad, lovely looking animal.
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I am so sorry. I had my 18-year-old pekingese put down 5 years ago. I’d had her from the age of 12, so it was truly like losing a family member. I still haven’t been able to “replace” her with another dog, so I understand how devastating it is. I am sorry!
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I’m so sorry to hear about Zella. It’s never easy losing a pet. Hugs to your family and to Lucy.
Thats a beautiful portrait of Zella! Georg Williams is one of my favorites!
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So sorry for your loss =(
Laura’s last blog post..Bike Night Update.
It can be rough, but one thing I have learned from loosing pets is that, the good sticks in your head and the bad disappears so much more so than even loved humans. It certainly lends creedance to the phrase “all dogs go to heaven.”
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That’s remarkably sad, and I’m so very sorry for you guys.
And that’s a great picture, I hope you have it framed somewhere.
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Oh, no, what sad news! It’s not easy to lose a pet.
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I am so very sorry. I’m in tears reading this. I am a dog person, and can fully understand what an incredible loss this is for you and your family. My heart goes out to you all. *hugs* to everyone, including Lucy.
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I am very, very, very for everyone’s loss (especially Lucy). However, thirteen years is a grand old age for a German Shepherd so that is a testament to your love and care.
Be well.
oh zella.
i cried for days when we put my dog ebony down 2 years ago. i’d had her since 4th grade and she made it all the way through college. i’m getting teary just thinking about it. i’m ehugging you from pittsburgh right now.
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I am so sorry for your loss. Zella will be missed by everyone very much. My heart goes out to you, CS, Sun and Luc.
So sad…sorry. I know what you mean after Katrina…it still seems sometimes thing are still a little crazy. One of our cats ran away after we got back from evacuating. Miss him
Love your blog. Hope to see you at the Blogher Reach Out Tour in N.O.
I’m so sorry.
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I’m very sorry. I have a pet portrait of my dog Gilda by Georg Williams. He has a way of capturing the best of every pet he paints. And I can see that Zella definitely captured your heart.
aww, heartbreaking what pets do…getting under your skin and making you feel so attached…Sun won’t remember, exactly, but there will be hints and reminders of Zella for the rest of her life.
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I am so so sorry to hear about Zella! Losing animals is never easy.
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I’m so sorry for your loss and Sun’s too. It’s hard to put into words how you truly feel when you lose a pet but you did a damn good job.
Oh.. I am so sorry for your loss.. sorry this is so late..I am catching up with my favorite blogs finally.. I really am so sorry.
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