Oh, How Fortuna’s Wheel has Been Turning
May 3rd, 2008 by Nola
If you don’t follow me on twitter, you don’t know the run of bad luck I have been having. Wednesday, Captain Sarcastic called to tell me he had bad news. “Who died?” I asked, “No; it’s not that. My car started to make a weird noise…” “Is there a cat stuck in your engine?” (that had happened to me once in law school). “No. The mechanic says I need a new engine. It’ll cost $3,000.” His car is eight years old (mine is ten). I tell him to drive straight to our friend–he works on a car lot and can get us the best deal on a new or used car.
CS calls back soon thereafter to tell me he didn’t make it. His engine officially blew out on the Greater New Orleans Bridge. Lovely. After a long afternoon, we settled on buying a very stripped down 2009 Dodge Journey. Since Wednesday, I have been having fits about being in a car note again. Suffice to say, we will be eating a lot more home-cooked meals. And that’s not terrible.
Yesterday, I finally accepted that we could manage the car note and let it be. Only to come home and find the SECOND red light photo ticket sitting in the mailbox for me. That’s another $110. The first one I thought I’d fight (it’s the lawyer in me). But after mailing it in to fight it, I have been advised that it isn’t worth fighting and I will now also have to pay court costs. Again, it took me all night to come to terms with this hemorrhaging of money it seems we are doing lately.
Today, I woke up renewed. I think it was the margarita I drank last night that helped me sleep. I loaded Sun into our new fangled car and drove to meet CS. At a light, I felt a bump. “What the…?” Sure enough, I had been rear ended. In case you lost count, this is in the THREE DAY OLD CAR. I stepped out of the car and see a large scratch on the bumper. Errrr. The couple in the other car are screaming at each other–the female passenger is screaming profanities intermingled with expressions of not having insurance. My blood pressure continued to rise as Fortuna’s wheel dipped.
Folks, I swear I am not making up what happened next. The driver of the other car stepped out of his car. With his Red Stripe in his hand. Red Stripe beer. In his hand. Beer. Hand. Driver. I could not believe my eyes. I must have done a quadruple-take. And what did he do with his beer? Well, he DRANK IT, of course. I swooned. Then returned to tend to a screaming baby. Then I called the cops and began the wait. All the while, the driver is screaming at me that there’s no damage and I am being ridiculous. And the female passenger is crying asking me how long this will take.
Then I wise up and ask for their information. The female is now sitting in the drivers’ seat. She hands me her license and (God bless) the car’s insurance card. As I am writing her information down, my pen explodes. Blue ink all over my fingers. Undaunted, I stay on my task and tell her, “I hope you don’t plan on telling the cop you were driving.” Then I tell them I need to see HIS license. There is more screaming from her to him. He steps out of the car and comes around to me. Then he turns to his girlfriend who is screaming that she can’t believe he doesn’t have a license (somehow I could believe it) and screams, “BITCH, SHUT UP OR I WILL KILL YOU.” And what does your fearless dumb Nola do? She tells the boyfriend, “Look! It isn’t her fault or mine that YOU caused this accident. If you don’t have a license, just say so but stop screaming already!” Then I hightailed my ass back to the safety of my car.
And I kept an eye on that beer bottle. I was expecting them to throw it in the bushes on the neutral ground. He didn’t. As he got out of the car over his license inquiry, I had seen him tuck the bottle between the seats of the car.
Finally, the cop shows up. I hear the other driver say the accident was the result of slippery wet streets. I tell the cop about the beer bottle. You know, the RED STRIPE BEER I SAW HIM DRINKING AFTER HE HIT MY CAR. The cop goes back to the other car and I watch in the rear-view mirror. He has the driver open the back door of his car and shuffle some things around (the driver, not the cop). Then the cop comes back and tells me, “I don’t see a beer bottle. And I don’t smell booze on his breath. And he’s not slurring his speech.”
Inside, I raged against the injustice; the laziness; the stupidity. I said, “He should be sent to jail.” To which the cop responded, “There’s no proof he was drinking.” And I responded, “Yes there is. It’s in the car. He didn’t throw the bottle outside. Look under the seat yourself.” He shrugged me off and said, “He’ll get a ticket for no license.” The end.
It dragged on, but that was the gist of it. Once I pulled away, I burst into tears. This kind of thing really offends the lawyer in me. I get that it could have been a lot worse–that Sun or I could have been hurt or the car, you know, totaled. I GET IT. But it does NOT negate the fact that this man was driving WHILE DRINKING A BEER I SAW THE BRAND NAME OF with no license. I am pretty certain had that have been me, CS would have been retrieving me from jail.
And my anger! I know had I left it unchecked, I WOULD have been arrested for assaulting a police officer, verbally or physically (depending on how off the deep end I’d have gone). It took every ounce of my self control to keep that anger in check. It wasn’t easy. Especially watching the other driver walk around chatting on his cell phone like this was all nothing.
After it was all over and done with, I swapped cars with CS. I also give him Sun and her baby bag. As I was driving off, I looked at the back of our new car. It seems what I thought was a scratch was dirt. There is, in fact, such little damage you cannot see it from two feet away. It makes me giggle. Had I seen NO damage and NO beer, I’d have driven off without concern. Serves that jerk right.
A bit placated, I drove to get coffee at CC’s on Veteran’s Boulevard. After ordering and pulling up, I realized the cash I left the house with was not in my wallet–I must have put it in the baby bag. Oh, for the love of all things holy! I pulled up and explained to the clerk, whose name tag said “Rita,” that I was having one of THOSE days and left my cash behind and could I charge the $2.75? Lovely Rita says, “Sure you CAN, but don’t worry. Here (and she handed me my coffee). Catch us back next time.” I almost burst into tears again.
Later, I realized my cash was in the pocket of my jeans. Doh! So I returned to CC’s to make right. Sweet Rita was still working the drive-thru. She simply WOULD NOT let me pay for my earlier cafe au lait. So I gave her a $5 tip. And I drove away wondering what state I’d have to move to in order to stay married to CS but to also marry the sweet and lovely Rita.
I go away for a couple of days and you start having all sorts of adventures!
That’s crazy, is it a legal issue that the cop could not search inside the car himself?
It’s runs of luck like that that really push my nerve.
Nice ending though.
Xbox4NappyRash’s last blog post..Allez Les Bleus!
The day before I was graduating from Tulane I had a huge family lunch planned at Commander’s Palace…then I got stuck in stop & go traffic on St. Charles. Stop. Go. Stop. Go. Suddenly, as I was coasting, the woman in front of me stopped to let a car in from the neutral ground and I tapped the back of her. I offered her my licences & registration as all the damage was to my car not hers. Instead she called the police, made me wait FIVE HOURS for the police to arrive and then smacked me with a lawsuit claiming millions of dollars in emotional suffering, loss of enjoyment of life & the like. Her car didn’t even have a SCRATCH on it. Her boyfriend also threatened to kill my father (who stopped by with Commander’s leftovers for me) and I eventually had to call my friend who was a bouncer at a bar to come sit with me so I felt safe. On St. Charles Avenue. Go figure.
I. Hate. That. Woman.
And now I’m trying to become a Plaintiff’s attorney.
(And we settled the case out of court much to my dismay, especially considering I’d specifically told my attorney’s NOT to settle the case.)
Daisy Duke’s last blog post..To Do
like i said on twitter, I know who Rita is, and yeah, the whole staff of that CCs are wonderful people. And I <3 you for calling the Crescent City Connection the GNO.
Am glad you and Sun are OK. It’s little justice, but that no-drivers-license ticket is going to set him back a LOT of money, plus he actually will have to appear in court. He’s got some headaches to come for rear-ending you.
YatPundit’s last blog post..My tried-and-true JazzFest parking/transportation strategy
You want a thin blue line sticker? Might help with the popo, next time.
SoMo’s last blog post..A Question for the Masses
Get out of my head! We’re so similar with the luck beating us to death. I’ve had months like this where every thing goes completely wrong: I fall down a flight of stairs, I bomb an interview, get into an accident, get a rolling stop sign ticket… Yeah. I feel your pain. You’re lucky you have a great husband =). Isn’t it great how kind a random stranger will be? Good luck, chica!
Jane Moneypenny’s last blog post..Notes On The Benefit of Having Married Friends
Next time you see Rita, tell her she earned some dazzling golden stars on her quick lane to heaven book.
lilalia’s last blog post..Looking for the Mouse
You were right to try to get that guy off the road. No telling how bad he was trashed. But everything’s O.K., so the Rita incident must signal the beginning of Fortuna’s upward turn.
As Chaucer said in The Monk’s Tale:
And thus does Fortune’s wheel turn treacherously
And out of happiness bring men to sorrow.
So must the opposite be true.
Hmmm. Kinda like my recent post about the drunk lady at the Ritz who drove away from valet without a blink!
Rita was just paying it forward. Now it is your turn honey.
mybayouvieux’s last blog post..What would you do?
*hugz*
I knew you were going to go and try to pay Rita. I like the previous commenter’s take- pay it forward. You know, give away some free stuff. Wait, it seems like you might have done that today…
And yay for unassisted standing. Perhaps next time you should remind me that when I’m not supposed to lift anything over 2 pounds that I shouldn’t hold your (adorable) daughter. I’ve been paying ever since, and yet I know that if given the chance, I’d pick her back up again right now if I could. She’s a riot, and she’s really going to give you a run for your money now.
I thinks I need to read Confed of Dunces. I’m adding it to my list.
Katie’s last blog post..Just for the record…
Nola, I’m so glad you weren’t hurt. I am upset that this guy is still on the road, still drinking while diving. He will hurt someone some day.
And, Pete, Canterbury Tales? Will you marry me?
What’s Rita’s number? I could really use a friend (and free coffee).
I’m glad your luck changed.
peg’s last blog post..Flashback Friday - Landscape Look
I hate those kind of days. I glad your luck changed. Lovely Rita…
Tara R.’s last blog post..GET UP! - Part Drei
Moondance–you may want to propose to the Google and the Wiki.
Good grief! I’m so sorry this all happened. Such a nightmare having car issues alone, throw in a drunken moron, and I lose my cool. Good for you for keeping your composure. I would have been in tears the whole time.
Sandy (Momisodes)’s last blog post..Birthday Karma
Oh man! You have no idea how many people I see drinking beer while driving around this city. I am always SHOCKED, and never know what to do about it. This kind of behavior is so troublesome, and it seems to be acceptable around here?!? I am sorry, so very sorry. Thank goodness for the Ritas of the world! Take care.
Laura’s last blog post..Dancing in the Rain
Ugh! You poor thing! What a mess. I think it’s horrible that guy didn’t get busted with his beer!!! I would’ve been furious.
I got angry when reading your post when the officer said I don’t smell beer on his breath.. I can only imagine your rage.
I am glad everything turned out okay and that god lead you over to Rita for some simple kindness that was much needed on your end..
Kim’s last blog post..Sunday Snap Shots
Glad you’re ok. That would be terrifying!
And breaking down on the GNO? I’d freak.
Glad Rita gave a smile to that day!
hahahahaha, we’re so alike. I worry ALL THE TIME, too. I was born with a streak of grey hair, even. I also don’t sleep well, unless I’m sick (which only happens twice a year or so), but then I end up waking up coughing myself to death.
It wasn’t a depressing comment.
You’re right. It’s the journey that matters; I don’t think this Europe trip would matter nearly enough if I wasn’t where I am right now in life.
Jane Moneypenny’s last blog post..What Would You Do?
Yeah, I feel your pain too … I thought all cars should be banned from New Orleans and everyone should take streetcars (that would be running on every street) until I then saw a story in the T-P about two streetcars that collided!!! Sometimes it feels like you just can’t win in this town ….
Another of my friends commented that the people in NOLA are the nicest on the planet … that is until they get in a car ….
Hope the ‘wheel’ is now on the upswing for you!!!
Kirsty’s last blog post..N’awlins Hoosies Uptown
Sweet jesus, what a day you had!
The only thing I can say that hasn’t been said already is that that may be the only time a camera phone is useful.
i think utah. but texas might do, too. and i think arizona as well. now let us all hug rita. i think all ritas deserve a hug for that one. i have a special place in my fist for bad drivers. ugh.
jameil1922’s last blog post..Questions: Trois
You’re going to think I’m joking but I swear to you this true. I too got in a wrecked (not rear ended but sideswiped) in a week old new car (this was 10 years ago) by a guy drinking a red stripe. He was alone in the car but it wasn’t his. It was his girlfriends and he tried to give me his girlfriend’s insurance card. He asked me to tell the insurance co. that she was driving. Could it be the same couple? If it is, I am totally surprised they are still together.
Awww, that has got to be the worst day ever! I would have been terrified at the whole beer drinking fender bender…you did good!
I hope this week has gone a little more smoothly <3
Huckdoll’s last blog post..Seven Deadly Sins
It’s amazing what a free cup of coffee can do to your spirits.
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